Funniest Picture I've seen so far!

June 24, 2006 20066 5:48 am | In Funny | 3 Comments

A. The first photo was taken when the Chinese president went to US.

B. The second photo was taken when Bush went to China.

This is how you should run contests!

June 24, 2006 20066 5:42 am | In Funny | Comments Off

Two men drove to a gas station for a fill-up
because they heard about a contest being offered by
the station to patrons who purchase a full tank of
gas. When they went inside to pay, the men asked
the attendant about the contest.
"If you win, you're entitled to free sex," said
the attendant.

"How do we enter?" asked the first man.

"Well, I'm thinking of a number between 1-10, if
you guess right, you win free sex."

"O.K. I guess 7, " said the first man.

"Sorry, I was thinking of 8," replied the
attendant. "Come back soon and try again"

The next week, the two men returned to the same
station to get gas. When they went inside to pay,
the second man asked the attendant if the contest
was still going on.

"Sure," replied the attendant. "I'm thinking of
a number between 1-10, if you guess right. You win
free sex."

"2" said the second man

"Sorry, I was thinking of 3," replied the
attendant. "Come back soon and try again."

As they walked back to the car, the first man
said to the second man,"You know, I'm beginning to
think this contest is rigged."

"No way," said the second man. "My wife won
twice last week."

2 places boringest always go for cheap thrills =)

June 24, 2006 20066 5:36 am | In Funny | Comments Off

Since I'm very the boring one, I find it really hard to amuse myself, so have to resort to others lah. So, if I were in a bad mood, where do I go for some instant relief?

1. Metacafe - watch the short vids and laugh at the racist jokes and comments. Comments can be extreme sometimes, when ppl across the world steps on each other's toes. So far, these are the popular topics:

- muslims vs americans
- israelis vs the rest
- americans vs the rest of the world
- Keeley Hazell
- middle east guys vs the rest of the world
- slovaks vs the rest of the world
- fake!!!
- and most recently indians vs the rest.

I bet after a while, you'll start spouting out stuff like lmao, and lol very frequently!

2. IMDB forums - watch stupid movies and see ppl arguing over small details. Popular topics include:

- racism (e.g. for Nacho Libre and Tokyo Drift, there were some funny racist posts there)
- religion (e.g. Da Vinci code)
- old vs young (this happens when a young guy says an old film (e.g. Dr Strangelove) sucks, then all the old guys will come and bash the young ones)

the annoying thing is that you'll need to register to access the forums. Any other sites you guys would recommend?

Boringest Games Review!

June 23, 2006 20066 9:43 pm | In Personal | 6 Comments

I did my super-long movie review yesterday and now it's the turn of the games (some are already completed, some I'm still playing):

1. Vampire - The Masquerade - Bloodlines: Quite an old game now but I loved the 1st one, pretty interesting storyline but I think the fighting scenes are not done very well. Still playing though. (7/10)

2. Fable - The Lost Chapters: This game is really fun to play. Another RPG, this time it's about you as a boy who trains to become a hero. You age as you progress through the game and through the skills you decide to pursue. Some parts can be really funny like trying to bed as many women as you can by flirting, doing a sexy pose, arm pump, get her drunk, buy her diamonds, etc. You can also get tattoos to make yourself look good/scary and you also have this good and evil points thing. (8.5/10)

3. Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic - quite a good storyline, makes you relive the Star Wars experience as a mysterious guy who discovered that the Force is strong within him. You get to travel from planet to planet in search of the Star Maps which will lead to the mystery of how the Sith lords managed to assemble a strike force so quickly with lotsa side quests on the way. Weapons are all good, where you can upgrade them and you get to learn all the powers which depend on which side of the Force you're in. Also, there are plenty of puzzles for you to solve (prime nos, number patterns, etc) and swoop racing to entertain you if you're bored. (8.4/10)

4. Battlefield 2: Awesome multiplayer FPS, allows you to drive quite alot of vehicles and command your team to attack/defend a territory. Very fun game if you have lotsa friends into it. But if you're playing alone, there are quite alot of custom singleplayer maps made by enthusiasts available for downloads. (8/10)

5. Hitman - Blood Money: You're a hitman, and you're given missions to assassinate ppl. Do it quietly and stealthily or kill everyone in sight, it's up to you. It's quite a difficult game I think since you have to figure out who to kill to get their uniforms for disguise and 1 wrong step can send a troop of bodyguards/soldiers to hunt you down. Abit buggy I think, where there's this mission which happens in an opera which would crash if your sound settings is set to full acceleration in Windows. (7.6/10)

6. Half-Life 2 - Episode 1: Quite disappointed with this game really. Very short game where you can finish within 3-4 hours and it doesn't really reveal much about the story. Looking forward to know more about G-Man though in the next episode. (6.8/10)

7. Elder Scrolls IV - Oblivion: This is a game where you can spend hours just walking around the world. Very open-ended and the world is just huge! But beware of the high requirements needed, even on my desktop, I can't use it to display all the effects that I want! Will probably need to upgrade to dual ATI X1900XTX to play this game at ultra high with everything on Max! (8.6/10)

8. Prey (Demo): This game looks really good, and it's kinda crazy 'cos you're in an alien ship, and you really feel that you're in one. There are portal like things in a dustbin like thing, which links you to different parts of the ship, the ability to walk upside down through gravity altered walkways, separate your soul from your body to open doors, kill enemies, etc. Probably the first FPS to make me feel abit giddy after playing for awhile. Doom 3 engine makes it look pretty good though even on a not high end graphics card like mine. Will be looking forward to the launch =) (8.2/10)

9. F.E.A.R.: A scary FPS game, kinda freaks you out when you're crouching in a vent duct and you see the ghost walk on its back like a spider a la Exorcist towards you. Again another game which needs quite high specs to get decent gameplay graphics but it's pretty nice to play. (8.3/10)

So, that's all the games I've been playing since 2 weeks ago, any more recommendations for me?

Boringest Movie Review!

June 23, 2006 20066 7:29 am | In Personal | 4 Comments

Since 2 weeks ago, I've been catching up on the movies I've missed the whole year and here's the list and their ratings/comments (might include some I watched in the past month or so as well):

1. Domino - I don't think Keira Knightley suits such a role, and there's a weird scene where this guy posed as a pastor comes from nowhere in the middle of the desert and talks to them about returning the money, etc. (5/10)

2. Cars - I think I'm getting old now, can't appreciate this movie really, and I think this is really a kiddie movie (Rating if I were a kid: 6/10)

3. Over the Hedge - Trailer looks better than it really is. Very disappointed with this one. (6/10)

4. Hoodwinked - I think the funniest scene in the whole movie is when a tree fell near 2 tortoises and they shouted "Run!!!" to only crawl at a top tortoise speed =P Better than Over the Hedge though. (6.1/10)

5. World's Fastest Indian - very good show, probably the best film so far. Starts out abit slow but it's fun to watch Anthony Hopkins in a New Zealand accent and his determination to prove what he truly believes! Inspirational! (9/10)

6. Eight Below - slow, and the actor showed hardly any emotions at all. Most of the screentime belongs to the dogs though, and I think animals were harmed in this show =P Probably a show for those still undecided between a kid and a teen. (5/10)

7. Ice Age 2 - thought it would be good, but I think I slept through half of it. Too much screentime for Scrat, the mouse-like animal which chases after an acorn the whole show. (5/10)

8. Find Me Guilty - this is probably the 1st movie where you really see Vin Diesel act, this time as a gangster who's pissed off with his lawyer and decided to become his own lawyer. Nice and funny dialogue. (8/10)

9. MI3 - due to the lack of action movies this year, I think this is probably the best action film so far. I think the cinema speakers were abit too loud for my liking and I would have loved to see a scene where he steals the virus from inside the building. But to think MAS probably paid for a product placement only to appear in a junkyard, and seeing Chinese men and women in Shanghai still washing their clothes in the river, I would have to give minus points for that. (7/10)

10. Prime - divorcee in her late 30s going out with guy in his early 20s, where his mom turned out to be the woman's therapist. Went into the cinema with zero expectation but came out pretty amused by the film. Not too bad, makes me wonder if I should date an older woman…hehe. (7/10)

11. Nacho Libre - lotsa jokes about corn, farting and Jack Black humour makes this film very enjoyable to watch. Fun movie! (7.5/10)

12. Dr Stangelove: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb - I know this a very old film but after reading a book which referred some scene from it a few days ago, I decided to get this DVD for some entertainment. Some say it's a classic and after watching it I realised alot more references in newspapers and articles were based on it. Pretty subtle humour and at times eccentric but you gotta set yourself in the period when USA and the Soviet Union were having the cold war to truly enjoy the film. (7.2/10)

13. Thank You for Smoking - tastefully done movie about a lobbyist for the tobacco industry. Not slap stick humour but still it's very funny in a satirical way and kinda thought-provoking too. Good for those abit intellectual, lotsa hidden subtle humour where you'll need to discuss with friends to discover it and this is probably the only movie you'll see where a man is almost killed by nicotine patches and though it talks about the tobacco industry, you won't see a single cigarette being lighted up in the whole movie! (8.2/10)

14. X-Men 3 - way below expectations, story feels very undeveloped and lotsa characters were underutilised + I can't help but feel that Famke Janssen/Jean Grey looks really old now compared to the days when she was Xenia Onatopp in Goldeneye almost a decade ago. Too short a movie I think, and I missed the scene after the credits =( Movie holds more potential than this I think but I guess they ran out of budget or time. (6.2/10)

15. Cry Wolf - teen thriller, pretty good storyline I think if you forgive the acting of the main character. Anyway, an OK movie for a lazy day. (6.1/10)

16. The Omen - hmm, less scary than I expected. Not very well done I think. (5/10)

17. Poseidon - Despite the massive budget ($160billion!), I can't believe they used so many nobodies in the film and the set looks like it came straight out of Titanic and the CGI effects weren't particularly impressive either. Is 2006 a bad year for action films? (4/10)

18. Da Vinci Code - Anyone feels that this movie has a serious case of miscasts besides Ian McKellen? Anyway, reading the book really spoils the movie and I feel that it's abit too long and overhyped. (5/10)

19. Bandidas - I think I watched this show just for Salma Hayek and Penélope Cruz. Nuff said. (5.2/10)

20. Inside Man - pretty interesting movie and I think Clive Owen could be one of my favourite actors soon. Nice plot, and I think this could be the 1st time you'll see Jodie Foster in a business suit and not in any big trouble. (7.5/10)

21. BloodRayne - this is probably the worst movie of all time! I can't believe I finished watching the whole movie without skipping any scenes and that could be due to my weakness to vampire films. Anyway, there's this sex scene with Kristina Loken in it which came out of the blue which really shocked me…lol. Really crap movie! (1/10)

22. Chaos - another Inside Man film but direct to DVD? I think the plot's pretty good though but it's just the quality of acting in general that kinda spoiled it. Entertaining (6.2/10)

23. Derailed - I have to say Jennifer Aniston looks really hot in this movie, but I felt really disgusted when she gets 'raped' near the beginning of the show which kinda spoiled the movie for me but it kinda redeemed itself with an ok plot and Clive Owen's acting. (6/10)

24. Shopgirl - You would think a Steve Martin film would have lotsa slap stick humour but this show is kinda serious. In fact, it's a really serious film. Makes you kinda think about love and things like that. Emotionally engaging I would think but starts off really slow. (6.1/10)

25. Lucky Number Slevin - this film is the type where not everything is very clear till near the end, might piss some ppl off but I think it's not too bad. It's something like Revolver I think. (6.8/10)

26. 16 Blocks - Mos Def is kinda annoying in this film because of the way he speaks but it's pretty entertaining actually. And you get to see Bruce Willis with a tummy…lol. (6.5/10)

27. Freedomland - Slow moving so you need some patience to watch this but I think the story's ok. Julianne Moore saved the day though due to the character she can be really annoying. (5.5/10)

28. The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift - nice cars, quite alot of action but not so nice chicks (I think I only saw like 2 real jap chicks in the film but tattoos near the butt crack's pretty cool). Watch it just for the cars and you'll enjoy it. (6/10)

29. The Break Up - again, Jennifer Aniston looks gorgeous, and I think she looks better than Angelina Jolie now but story's abit weak, most of the funny parts were those shown in the trailer and I find the story abit weak really. (5.5/10)

30. Ultraviolet - good start to the film but kinda degenerates near the middle point of the movie and Milla Jovovich looks weird in the wig. Might be better if it were an animated film. (5.5/10)

31. The Hills Have Eyes - not too bad I think, interesting remake though I never saw the original. It was entertaining but I find the boy kinda annoying. (6/10)

32. Failure to Launch - ok film I think, but they should have used another lead actress for it. Ok movie to watch with your gf. (5.5/10)

I think the above are those I've watched for the past few weeks and these are the ones I've watched and I kinda remembered about them, when I wrote about the movies above:

33. Two for the Money - I liked this movie but it's probably because of Al Pacino. Anyway, quite interesting and definitely worth o=your money in the cinema. (6.8/10)

34. V for Vendetta - Violence can be used for good? And I quote from the movie: "A building is a symbol, as is the act of destroying it. Symbols are given power by people. A symbol, in and of itself is powerless, but with enough people behind it, blowing up a building can change the world." One of the more interesting movies to have appeared on screen so far. (7.7/10)

35. She's the Man - Teen flick with some real funny scenes especially the parts where "he" was picking up girls…lol. Good movie for a lazy Sunday. (6/10)

36. Basic Instinct 2 - Saw this after I saw Sharon Stone in Leicester Square. But I think the movie really sucked, they need a better lead actor. (5/10)

37. Good Night and Good Luck - I think I mentioned this movie somewhere in my blog before but I seriously think this is also one of the good movies to have appeared this year. Although done in black and white, the show's really good, moves at quite a good tempo and has quite alot of quotable quotes e.g about the media:

"Edward R. Murrow: To those who say people wouldn't look; they wouldn't be interested; they're too complacent, indifferent and insulated, I can only reply: There is, in one reporter's opinion, considerable evidence against that contention. But even if they are right, what have they got to lose? Because if they are right, and this instrument is good for nothing but to entertain, amuse and insulate, then the tube is flickering now and we will soon see that the whole struggle is lost. This instrument can teach, it can illuminate; yes, and it can even inspire. But it can do so only to the extent that humans are determined to use it to those ends. Otherwise it is merely wires and lights in a box. Good night, and good luck."

Simply beautiful. (9/10)

38. Firewall - Harrison Ford back again as a hero in his 60s? Watchable, but he should retire and let us remember him as Han Solo and Indiana Jones =) (5/10)

39. Pink Panther - not so funny. I think it's better if you watch the original one by Peter Sellers. Deeply disappointed (4.5/10)

40. Date Movie - I thought it would be really funny but I think the only scene worth watching is when Alyson Hannigan was dancing in the streets in a fat suit a la Shallow Hal and she got hosed down by the firemen…lol. (3/10)

41. Tsotsi - a movie about a South African man-boy gang leader. Quite slow moving but gives you some insight into the great income disparity in South Africa. (6/10)

This is probably my longest entry so far but I think I got kinda lazy near the end. =P Thanks for reading!