Malaysia Inc.

A joke which is kinda true…

An Malaysian automobile company and a Country X auto company decided to have a competitive boat race on the Klang River. Both teams practiced hard and long to reach their peak performance. On the big day, they were as ready as they could be. The Country X team won by a mile.

Afterwards, the Malaysian team became discouraged by the loss and their morale sagged. Corporate management decided that the reason for the crushing defeat had to be found. A Continuous Measurable Improvement Team of "Executives" was set up to investigate the problem and to recommend appropriate corrective action. Their conclusion: The problem was that the Country X team had 8 people rowing and 1 person steering, whereas the Malaysian team had 1 person rowing and 8 people steering.

The Malaysian Corporate Steering Committee immediately hired a consulting firm to do a study on the management structure. After some time and billions of dollars, the consulting firm concluded that "too many people were steering and not enough rowing." To prevent losing to the Country X again next year, the management structure was changed to "4 Steering Managers, 3 Area Steering Managers, and 1 Staff Steering Manager" and a new performance system for the person rowing the boat to give more incentive to work harder and become a six sigma performer. "We must give him empowerment and enrichment." That ought to do it.

The next year the Country X team won by two miles. The Malaysian Corporation laid off the rower for poor performance, sold all of the paddles, cancelled all capital investments for new equipment, halted development of a new canoe, awarded high performance awards to the consulting firm, and distributed the money saved as bonuses to the senior executives.